Thoughts

Thoughtful Tuesday: To Another Decade and Hopefully Some More

As I write this, entered another decade a week ago. It is amazing that when you are little all you want to be is big so that you can get to do interesting activities. Then when you finally get of the legal age and want to see the world. I really wanted to move out and see the world at that age but as then my financial ties were with my parents’, I put that dream on hold. As soon as I entered two decades and said good-bye to teenage hood I got the chance. I think being young and foolish can be a saving grace, you are oblivious to the dangers of the world and just want to live for that moment. Not knowing–that how you arrive at that moment can sometimes cost you a great deal. I remember not knowing what I wanted in life and living with the fear of failure–that I had to achieve certain things at a certain age.

When you leave home at two decades and l slowly start to realize the responsibility that comes with being an adult. It can get overwhelming. The best advice I was given by my father that I still abide by is live within your means.  That has saved me from going crazy and allowing financial institutions from coaxing me to get unnecessary loans and credit cards. I learnt to get by, by what I had. That in itself was and still is a humbling experience. I learnt to appreciate the struggles of those before me and sometimes used to wonder how my parents made it. Trying to survive on my own was tough; I couldn’t imagine someone looking up to me to survive. So I focused mainly on my studies and occasional partying as is part of the ritual of growing up. The greatest lesson I learnt is to be independent means having your own back.  It means that if you don’t make sure that bill is paid, that problem is solved and getting yourself to where you need to be on time. You are going to be held responsible. No one gives a damn about your problems because they have their own and no one has time to show you the ropes. Maybe because they do not know how, then there are those trolls that enjoy to see you suffer and rejoice in your pain. You have to be responsible enough to know that sweeping problems and hoping they will go away is just a fairy tale. Luckily, these lessons on financial matters and bills were taught at such a young age so I had an understanding of how the world works. Facing my problems head on took time.

I am not hung up on entering another decade, I do not even feel old. If you ever feel a number makes you old google Baddie Winkle—now that’s what I call living. I embrace that I am here, healthy and working on and living my dream.  My relationships have shifted, I am now allergic to nonsense. I know what I want in life and slowly seeing the light on my purpose. I feel like all the experiences and things that have happened along the way have shaped me into becoming who I am today—fearless. Due to my past experiences, I have learnt to be unapologetic about living my life my way. Unapologetic—do not mistake that for selfishness. It just means I will not compromise my goals to please society or those around me for the sake of being like everybody else. My light and my path is my own. Some may see my vision– some may not, and that is okay. Some things that happen are beyond my own understanding,but I live with the comfort of knowing that everything is going to be okay. Knowing the work I have put in will eventually pay off, I have to keep focused on my goal. I may have not bought my dream car, apartment or some other material item yet that would bring me a notion of false status. The fact that the love and relationships in my life are purely healthy, nurturing and I have my health— that makes me feel super wealthy. Time a precious commodity that I cherish, I am not worrying about what other’s are doing but focused on ensuring that I leave a positive impact to those I meet an interact with. By changing how I view the world and choosing happiness I am thankful to be in a better place.

For those of you going through an age crisis, it’s never that serious. Be thankful for how far you’ve come despite the challenges and wear your age like an achievement badge. Many people would have loved to live as long as you–but did not make it. Spread love, be love and be the joy to others in your life but most of all be kind and treat others as you would yourself. That unkind thought or action will always come back to you.

Namaste

Donna

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2 Comments

  • Reply
    Crystal Olisa
    17/09/2015 at 13:27

    Happy (very) belated birthday ?? Also learning that it’s never that serious, though I tend to have an age crisis every birthday these days lol. Great post ??

    • Reply
      donnasmelange
      17/09/2015 at 14:40

      Thanks Crystal ? for the wishes & appreciation ?. It comes & goes but I now understand when people say they wouldn’t trade their age for anything.

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